no need to be lonely

Walking with a friend in the dark is always better than walking alone in the light—Helen Keller
I’ve learned that while I have Parkinson’s disease, there’s no need to be lonely. I’m not the only person in this predicament.
Like most of us, I have friends who pre-date the onset of the disease in my life and have been nothing but supportive and tremendously helpful. But I’ve also made some special friends specifically because of my PD. Some of them have PD; other friendships have blossomed with people along the way.
It’s amazing how friendship can evolve rapidly when you share a challenge like this illness. It has a way of focusing your attention on what’s really important and how each day’s parade of people through our lives can bring joy, needed support and knowledge if we make the effort to reach out to others.
For me, support groups have provided a safe, caring place to heal from and cope with the storms that inevitably sweep through every life. They can help you feel, heal and move on.
An organization called Rebuilding, designed to help newly-divorced and separated individuals, was a Godsend when I faced the breakdown of my first marriage almost 25 years ago. Eventually, I became a facilitator of the 10-week course, made many friends both male and female and keep in touch with a smattering of them to this day. We had shared some of the most personal and hurtful details of our lives with each other, risking vulnerability but gaining new strength and understanding of relationships and ourselves in the process. And I met Vicki, the love of my life, through Rebuilding friends!
My own PD has made me more understanding of disabled people in general. My best male friend now is disabled – although you wouldn’t know it given the exemplary zest and energy he lives his life with daily.
I’ve also come to greatly appreciate the role support groups for people with PD and their primary caregivers have started to play in my life, specifically those organized by Parkinson Alberta Society. There are eight groups meeting monthly in Calgary area alone and about 20 more groups across the province by my count. Skilled and hardworking people like Client Services personnel Tanya Good and Harle Burnett in the Calgary region, ensure these meetings are effective and helpful.
PAS support groups provide a place to discuss our challenges, questions and fears in a confidential setting. It’s amazing how often we can provide each other with a helpful perspective, solutions or just a sympathetic ear. We learn how alike and yet how different the paths we are walking can be.
Vicki and I recently moved from a group with many older participants to a group of Young Onset patients closer to our age. It turns out that while the first group was very helpful and useful, we have more in common with the new group. I can, for example, talk with people who have had the Deep Brain Stimulation surgical procedure I’m eagerly awaiting. We have children who are the same age or some of us are trying to work full or part-time despite PD.
We’ve made new friends we’ll keep, I’m sure. Somehow, I also think the rewards will be more than worth the risks.
If you want to learn more about PD Support Groups here in Alberta, please contact the PAS office closest to you, email your request to info@parkinsonalberta.ca or visit www.parkinsonalberta.ca